Friend request means what?

Discussion in 'Conversations' started by Dana09, Oct 5, 2009.

  1. togata57

    togata57 Rising Contributor

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    Jeez loueeze, Karalyn. What physical and emotional burdens you and your family have to bear! Makes my problems seem pretty darned trivial. Wow. My heart goes out to you all.
     
  2. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Now that's what I call really friendly Karalynn! There's nothing like real help in a crisis, especially when it is long term.
    Unsung heroes indeed! I sure hope that your brother continues well. You must have a strong family to pull together like that.
    Special Olympics?
    Well, they now need funding here because the provincial government of BC has canceled funding for them, the year before the oly's begin - not too friendly I'd say!
    Also heard a news story that the same gov't elected by the same sheeple has now canceled the special training programme for autistic kids that actually enables them to have a near normal life, in the name of 'fairness' where they are saying that since not all autistic kids get this service and life-saving training it isn't fair to the rest and that now none will have it paid for! Not affordable to all. Meaning that those with that skill to train will now move out of province to where ever they can get work and our autistic kids will be back to their normal; which requires much more to be spent their whole lives long when they will not receive the care that can turn things around for them.
    Rather than raise the bar on how we deliver services to our population our 'liberal' gov't is lowering all as fast as they can. The haven't heard yet that Reaganomics don't work!
    More gambling revenue, less services, more taxes now too, from a gov't that promised the opposite of what they are delivering in all those areas and I call that downright unfriendly to the people.
    But this same government did return last month a programme they axed to help abused women due to the huge outcry so that's a bit friendlier. I'd hate to be all negative 'cause that was a big help as the legal aid system has also been drained by this gov't in recent years.
    None of those issues are mine but they hold my sympathy.
    Perhaps those canvassers do believe you but are very hard pressed to find any funds for anything extra in these days of recession and it must feel downright unfriendly to say no but priorities are that and games are games no matter who is playing, sorry.
    Karalynn, maybe you will win a cruise! Just listen for that magical sound of the cruise ship blowing its stack on the phone when you pick up around lunch or dinner time. I've won several times apparently.......;) but I'll just stick to the garden, stay off the streets and out of trouble.

    It's raining this morning at last!!! So it's a happy weather-head I am right now.

    D
     
  3. Karalyn

    Karalyn Active Member

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    I heard on the news this morning that rain will show up sometime this evening. So gotta get outside and take advantage of dry ground and move some plants around.
    Since I was on the computer in early hours yesterday, our main phone line rang, but DH didn't pick it up, since he saw that it was from my Sis in Law. We have a business line and home line. Where I'm at in the LR, there isn't a land line, so by the time I hear the phone, and jump up to run and catch it, either the caller has hung up or it goes to the message recorder. Which with our system, you have to dial a code in to listen to it, so it isn't as convenient as just having an open recorder. Anyway, 5 hours later, I notice the flashing light on the phone, call in my number, and my sis in law has informed me that my brother passed out while in the restroom, and she is hollering for her adult son with special needs to wake up and help her support my brother. (They stay up late over there since they don't have to go to work.)

    My sis in law was afraid to drive her car and have DBro pass out again so she called an ambulance. I think she might have been calling for our help, not sure, anyway DBro is at the ER and has H1N1 flu, blood pressure 90/45, was given 4 liters of fluid, and two prescriptions. They figured he passed out from dehydration. He also had a fever of 102*. So I informed her that I already had H1N1, she was a little surprised, but I didn't give it to my DB. He has another adult son living with them, a 4 1/2 year old grandson, and his son's
    "fiance'" is expecting another child in December. It is funny, because my sis in law is going to try and keep my brother away from these relations that share the house to keep them from getting the flu, when it was probably them that brought the flu to him in the first place. My sis in law works at a main hospital, the one son works at a local $1.00 store until he can find work in a pharmacy, and the pregnant fiance works at a Wally World.

    So there is no preventing anything from that lot, they are way too much in the public domain.
    So my poor SIL, has to miss another day at work for my brother, and her hospital job says that if she misses too many days due to illness she could lose her job. I find that hard to believe, as she is only parttime, and at a job noone really wants. It is somewhat stressful, as she is working with surgeons and family members of the patients operated on. So not everyone wants a job like that, but she suits it perfectly. They took a lot of time to train her and specifically hired her out of thousands of apps, and several interviews etc. So sometimes she gets overwhelmed and thinks the worst. I just don't think the hospital can let her go without a good fight on their hands. I mean, really, you are letting go of a good person that is trying to take care of her family, and its not her fault the Swine flu is coming around causing many people to become ill and miss a lot of work or school. Come on..really?

    Then to top it off, my brother had an appointment with a new Dr. since they are now on a different insurance program, and they had to cancel due to him catching the flu, and it took a while just to get an appt with the new Dr. so she has to reschedule. It still is all good, my brother can walk comfortably now on his leg that he had hip replacement surgery on. He's basically cured of Leukemia, but has esophagus damage from his first induction of strong chemo 2 years ago this December. So that did bring on problems when he had his hip surgery from scar tissue of the esophagus affecting stomach problems and then causing blood pressure and heart beat to rise which caused more stress as my brother and sister in law could see and hear the monitor which just brought more raising of the blood pressure. So the staff had to monitor his heart rate on a different floor so that my brother didn't know what was happening and wouldn't stress out.
    Then they decided to give him a sedative and something for his stomach. Oh, forgot to add, that because of all of this, he has blood clots, so they are watching that and treating with medication, and this is prolonging his return to any type of strenuous physical activity.

    So the best excitement now for my sis in law is the anticipation of having a new little baby granddaughter come into her life. Which she is very thrilled about since she raised 2 sons, and has a grandson, but now she gets her "little girl" to spoil. So it should be a fun Christmas time for them all.
     
  4. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Wow,
    An amazing life you are leading!
    It makes me appreciate the simple life I now lead being semi-retired.
    Since I do not work I get up early! Sometimes it's just way too early with weather-head but I also like getting up to photo the birds.
    Years ago dishwashers, the machines ;), were just becoming popular with households and I recall someone telling me how dramatically the number of colds dropped once they had one in their household where members served the public and lived with school aged children. So, it might be possible but now obviously too late for your family.
    I recall where a friend and I would visit with our young kids and sometimes not able to do so because some one of them was ill, so that we could avoid spreading whatever.
    It never worked as they would all come down with whatever was in the environment anyway despite our best efforts at quarantine. If a person goes to the store and touches money it could be game over right there! Seems hopeless but I still try the simple things like wearing gloves and leaving the area if someone is obviously ill with coughing and etc.

    All we can do is the best we can. At least now your bro will also have those anti bodies! He sounds like one tough cookie to have survived at all. Best of luck and good wishes to him and the rest of your caring family.

    D
     
  5. Karalyn

    Karalyn Active Member

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    Yes it is a miracle. Just his whole story, which my sis in law needs to write a book about. Little miracles happening all the time, but faith always precedes the miracle. It is a very surprising thing to have him become ill, because so far in my family's genes, we live a long and healthy life. So the type of leukemia he got was a fluke and is called AML. Which can be brought on by working around certain chemicals, etc. They say that sometimes genes can just mutate. When they did some more testing on my brother, some of the genes they saw mutating went back to normal. Very interesting indeed.

    I can see how dishwashers could really make a difference. They can get steamy hot and the detergent has chlorine in it. Well, at least I think so, because I can smell it when I open the dishwasher door. I do remember though as a kid handwashing the dishes in a sink full of hot sudsy water and then rinsing them in another sink full of hot clean water, with maybe a bit of chlorine in it and we would have to use tongs to get the dishes out of the water and placed in the draining rack. Two of my brothers had this chore as my 3 older siblings had other things to do.

    I always would dibb doing the dishes and have my younger brother wash the pans and counters. Either I hand washed them or loaded a dishwasher, can't recall. Also, my father was the type that if we went to bed not finishing this chore, he got us out. He was very good at that. If we left our bikes in the front yard and was in bed, he would make us get up and in the cold and damp air in the bay area of CA, fetch our bikes and put them in the back yard.

    And if you took your 14 year old brother to a movie theater, and you take your 16 year old friend to a drive in and then return to the theater to pick up little brother, and the theater is closed and then phone home to find out that a policeman brought my brother home. He would gently cupped my face and asked me, "You know what this means, don't you?" Me, "Uhh...grounded?" I couldn't drive the car for a week. He was such a great Dad.

    Your bird watching sounds fun. I keep waking up early as well. I guess because the days are shorter and I'm not working myself so hard in the heat of the summer outside gardening. We have birds come around, fun to watch, but I never see a blue bird in my area, but more in the eastern part of Idaho near the Tetons and Yellowstone Park. I was staying at a time share, just an hour away or less from West Yellowstone. I took a teenage boy from Thailand for a whirl wind quick trip to see eastern Idaho, Yellowstone Park and the Teton National Parks as well as Jackson Hole. I had to keep driving into the park and drive back to Island Park to where we were lodging. Very tiring when I'm the only driver.

    I get more finches, mourning doves, quail, mallard ducks, hawks, blue heron, robins, wood peckers, killdeer, humming birds, and I don't know what else since I don't actively have binoculars. I just have to use the naked eye which doesn't see as far as they use to.
     
  6. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    We weren't allowed to use hot for rinsing when I was a kid!
    Nor to have more than one light on in a room at a time.
    Your method of hot rinse with bleach reminds me of my first job at a fish & chips shop where that is how we washed & rinsed all the dishes.
    You have birds other than what we have here. I am going to start a thread of humming birds with the flowers they like here, in the photo section. They have started to remain here over winters and I have a jasmine they like to feed on then. Even last year when we had such a hard year! The jasmine is under an overhanging patio roof and so, survives the harshest weather and blooms all winter starting in Nov.
    I hope we get some real rain out of all this wind and weather systems we are having pass over us. Now that it is raining my head is fine! It is when the weather improves that I start getting weather-head! Open to suggestions on that.
    Interesting, how your brother's body responded! Too bad it couldn't have happened sooner and saved some expense ROFL - I bet you all laugh a lot! Especially now his health is improving. Amazing how that can be so. Just knowing that seems to open doors of possibility somehow......
    Something I always told my kids - that if they put a limit on themselves, that it would for sure limit them but if they kept that door open just a crack, there was always possibility, a chance, a maybe that could lead to success.

    D

    D
     
  7. Karalyn

    Karalyn Active Member

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    You are right...when you leave room for something good to come to you...it sure seems to do so. For an example...in case you don't watch the Biggest Loser TV show. There is this one lady that all good things keep coming her way, I think just by her attitude. She set herself back at first because she had a goal of being the first one on a mile beach walk. She had stressed her body...but her attitude kept her to still lose weight even when the Docs told her not to. There was a time she couldn't even exercise in water, only take the stairs down to the kitchen area. Then later she wins the golden ticket that allows her to pick certain people to be on her team. Then that causes a commotion and they want to vote her off, and still again, they vote off the injured and hurting lady's first partner. She is amazing and has a good and positive hubby, I think was in the armed forces. So I wonder how long she will still bring on positive action, until the others catch on to changing their mindset.

    That is interesting about not using hot water for rinsing. I'm not sure we always used chlorine in the water, but it was hot. It always felt good when washing dishes on a cool rainy winter day in California. Our heater was mounted on a wall and didn't have central heating like they do nowadays. Our washing machine for clothes was on our back covered patio. Unlike, here in Idaho, they are usually in the basements.
    I also was raised with an R.N. for a mother. While I was growing up, she worked as a school nurse, so she had holidays and summer off. Use to work in a hospital when my older siblings were younger. So she kept us safe, sort of, and didn't get all panicky or that sympathetic if we hurt ourselves. So my children are amazed at how calm and collect I am when something happens to them. And I raised 4 sons that all would cut something open! I don't know if you have heard of the movie "Napoleon Dynamite", but my first born and I guess the others were like the kid in the movie. Making ramps to jump their bicycles over and then cut their chins or lips when they hit pavement. So the movie just cracks me up, and more so since it was filmed in Idaho.

    While growing up in Calif. I went to a girl's camp every year as a teenager for a week. There were men there that cooked for us, actually the cook had been a chef on a Navy ship, so we got good food! Anyway, each cabin of girls would have some type of kitchen duty, and part of it was helping in the kitchen with the dishes. There they had boiling hot water in stainless steel tubs/sinks and a man would dip the silverware which were in a tray into the boiling water and then take them out to air dry. I also remember how sad it was that they had to throw out the extra food or cans of it. I can't recall why, either for health reasons or government, not sure.

    I will enjoy seeing the hummingbird photos. They are amazing little creatures.
    Are your weather head problems have to do with sinus headaches? Just stuffiness from dry weather?
     
  8. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Hi Kara,
    No, dear Dad was just cheap which is how I got enough to have a down payment on the house I bought after he died. Otherwise I would still be struggling.
    I am my own survival show so I don't watch that on TV.

    I used to put my washer out of the house in summer for the space in that tiny house in the country but had to bring it back inside when it got too cold and the motor oil got stiff. Got the HECK scared out of me one moonlit night when I went out back to hang the laundry, not knowing that a heron had taken up residence in the trees behind the house, so when it flew up squawking its horrible squawk) making a horrible loud noise completely unbird-like, all the hair on my body stood up in the dark, no lights out in the back garden. I standing up on the platform allowing access to the line, no way to run. OY!

    Migraines when the barometric pressure is on the rise, usually indicating good weather, is when I get them most often.

    Yes, that boiling water method - chem free! was also popular in England back in the '60's I recall hearing from someone who designed such systems or something like that. I wonder if the chem corps. are responsible for those sorts of changes? No one makes much money from hot water except for the savings in energy except we still use hot water with the chems. <insert head-scratching smilie here>

    What you write to start there above is similar to what is promoted in 'The Secret', isn't it? Some view that line of thought as a sort of spiritual materialism, others as a way of manipulating universal energy to one's advantage, losing those things that lock us into 'impossible!' mindset.
    There are records of people who have walked on water and left footprints in solid stone. But those were most often people who realized the importance of compassion for others and lived simple lives that required not much in the way of goods, opposite to how some interpret 'The Secret' as being how to get more, more easily.

    Many times I have read and heard of using visualization when ill, among other techniques, to promote healing.
    I was wondering if your brother did anything like that before his reversal started?
    Your mom must have been a great help too.

    Gosh, am doing seeds and the place stinks of anise scented hyssop - agastache very strongly. Better get it over with. Hummies love it.

    D
     
  9. Daniel Mosquin

    Daniel Mosquin Renowned Contributor UBC Botanical Garden Forums Administrator Forums Moderator 10 Years

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    Dana09, you may also like to read this review:

    Barbara Ehrenreich’s Bright-Sided Explores the Dark Side of Positive Thinking

    via Religion Dispatches

    You can also listen to an interview with Ehrenreich (as I did yesterday) via CBC's The Current: The Current for October 15, 2009
     
  10. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Oh Thanks so much Daniel, the Big D around here !

    Yes, sounds similar to the thought that rewards make losers out of those who do not receive them, (succinctly stated).
    What does it say about those friends who strived in vain to stay positively alive thru their cancers and 'failed' to do so?
    What does all that positivity do for my weather-head ? Oh! Must be my 'fault'! NOT!!!! but true according to the gurus who say they know so much better.

    Again, and again, back to the path of the middle way between extremes. Not nearly as bland as it sounds and way less hectic!


    I must have been listening to the alt. college radio I like to have missed The Current.

    Thks,
    d
     
  11. 2annbrow

    2annbrow Active Member

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    Wow, Dana & soccerdad - and I thought China was bad!
     
  12. 2annbrow

    2annbrow Active Member

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    Dana & Daniel
    My own interpretation of Zen - the open hand can receive a gift - the closed fist cannot.
     
  13. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Or sort of like the Taoist
    Full, cracked and empty vessels.

    The full one cannot receive,
    The cracked one cannot retain what it is given,
    the empty one is receptive.

    D
     
  14. 2annbrow

    2annbrow Active Member

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    Yes!

    "The readiness is all . . ." If one is not expecting anything in particular, it is easier to see the best of what one receives.
     
  15. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Better watch it Ann
    for next we'll be haiku-in' all over the place.

    ROFL
    Good Morning!

    D
     
  16. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Hi Ann,
    You may have thought we were exagerrating.
    But let me remind you that we are your gentle northern neighbours who do not know how to lie to you, friend in the garden!

    http://thetyee.ca/Opinion/2009/10/18/ChrisShawRight/

    An article about a staff member at UBC even! Reputedly a 'gentleman' who exemplifies the meaning of the word.
    The olys seem to create their own state within a state, much as does the papacy of Rome when it travels.

    D
     
  17. 2annbrow

    2annbrow Active Member

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    Dana -
    I didn't think you were exaggerating, I was just horrified! We have our own problems down here, and many of them, there's no doubt about it! But my partner grew up on a farm near Ontario (which is now under the tarmac of the airport, she believes), and is always extolling the virtues of the Canadian system. We had no idea! Has 60 Minutes heard about this? I am frankly appalled that such a thing could happen anywhere in the "free world!"
    You know, maybe that's why so many people focus an the "political chaos" we have here - we have a grand old tradition of washing our dirty linen very much in public!
     
  18. soccerdad

    soccerdad Active Member 10 Years

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    Canadians all believe that we have the world's most free country. In fact this is not true, but the complacency that this belief engenders enables our leaders to abuse us with impunity.

    Almost all of our laws are passed in the form of "regulations" made by the "governor general in council" which are not debated anywhere and which emerge without warning. My American friends are astonished when they see far-reaching legislation emerge in this way. "When will the public debate/hearings take place?" they tend to ask, and my answer is "never".

    It is said that in terms of pure autocratic power the PM of Canada has more than the leader of any country in the so-called free world.

    Just because we do not normally invade other countries or assassinate foreign leaders, and we do not believe in such neanderthal ideas as firearms ownership or state killings, we assume that we are superior to the US. Look deeper and you will see that the only difference is that we are weaker and hence our leaders cannot indulge their fantasies like yours can.
     
  19. 2annbrow

    2annbrow Active Member

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    To go back - way back - to the original post, for me a friend request means, "I like your attitude and the way you express yourself - I'd invite you home for a cup of coffee if I could! To be your friend means I could learn something new and worthwhile!"

    To rejoin the present: If you live in a country you don't think is the best, move!
    It seems only natural that our connection to our own part of the earth is almost as important as an umbilical cord. Even when mom is angry [noticed the strange weather?] she's still mom. But I learned from travelling with my Navy family that there are many different ways for people to live together without necessarily killing each other, and they are all "civilization." The flavor you grow up with seems the most natural, because you take it in with mother's milk.
    It seems to me that it's impossible for one person to predict what another can and will tolerate, to keep what they know, or love, best. Buddha forbid I should ever be given a choice between keeping my own blessed little half-acre and my family, and keeping my freedom of speech!
    I think one of the most important things about living anywhere is the freedom to live my way, and to let others live their way. Talk about bio-diversity! If the human race survives to maturity, I'm convinced that cultural diversity and the strength of the cross-fertilized "mutts" will play a huge part in that survival. I'm so glad I'm a "mutt!"
    To sum up, I'll quote (or misquote) Kipling:
    "There are nine and forty ways
    Of reciting tribal lays,
    And every single one of them is right!"
     
  20. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Mutts are way easier than purebreds to get along with!
    I'll always remember the young boy who didn't want my last small dog anywhere near him calling it a 'mutt' tsk tsk.
    Or the suited gent who asked me if I wasn't frightened by being approached by a grubby looking guy on Young St. in Toronto by the downtown library in '88, where I could see that the suited man wanted an excuse to call the police to have the unwanted one taken off the street. There were many such as he down on Queen St. in the park at the conservatory there which I visited while on my last visit to T.O. so I guess the one was out of place by the library.
    People seek their ideas of perfection and try to impose them on all around them. Our parents. peers, teachers, authorities and especially TV and government.

    As SD above says about the regulations, I too have been hearing a lot about this mentioned lately in the more thoughtful news shows on CBC and alt. radio. I wonder how many Canadians know this, about regs. that are never publicly discussed unless we hear about it before they go thru like those they are trying to use on health supplements and products - elimination thru regulation after an innocuous seeming bill precedes allowing this behind the scenes tinkering.

    Well, who could fault anyone for not knowing or being skeptical? Who would have dreamed of how the Olys would affect us until they got here? You know how people like to exaggerate their woes.
    I am glad I no longer live on the mainland and I'd like to think unaffected but even our local wee Qualicum airport was going to be shut down for the duration due to security concerns! I think they got that one fixed now, maybe.

    With all our woes I wouldn't go elsewhere to live. Warmer climes seem tempting but I would have to make friends with all sorts of poisonous wildlife we just don't have here. When I see a snake in the garden, it is usually trying to get away from me as fast as it can, just how I like it.
    In the rankings of best places to live, Canada usually comes pretty close to the top of the list.
    That does not mean we ought not to mention what we think is not right, just as those who we feel would oppress us do. That makes for dialogue but governments of the day always hold the power. I look at my government and then I look at my neighbours for that is where the gov't came from, as I sure didn't vote that way!
    The neighbours are good family people too. They walk their dog, are nice to their children and only wish for happiness, as do I. They also hoped for war in Iraq and Afghanistan! We simply disagree that the people in those countries would be happier with or without us killing them, very simplistically put. We each have our arguments for our differing views and especially about my gardening, they don't. But, we don't speak unless there's an emergency.

    After listening to Alt. radio for a few years now and checking into things on-line re: US left-wing media, I started to see it as not only an alt. voice but as an entire industry that is as entrenched as is the right.

    Often I find that what I wish for does not interfere with others and what I find most objectionable, does.
    Canadians complain fairly mildly and Americans seem more vociferous but in the end, even when millions of us protested around the world for no war in Iraq, no one listened to us.
    A globalized protest against more violence; now that's the sort of globalization I can live with!

    If you visit the 'my forte' thread you will see Roland the runty chihuahua who was given to me. Already, dear little Roland has had more sick days than my previous 'mutt' did in his whole life ! He is healthy and as strong as a 4 lb dog can be. The sweet and gentle Roland has a cheerful disposition and one of his AKA's is Rosy because of it. He makes for a very nice little friend who needs lots of love more than anything.
    No politics there!

    D
     
  21. Dana09

    Dana09 Active Member

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    Signing off this thread now, with Love
    Thks All
    D
     
  22. Karalyn

    Karalyn Active Member

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    Hey, you are right about the Blue Heron's awful sounding squawk! There was one heading across my yard one time, and a hawk that lives next door in the tall wild black locust trees that grow where any water is available, flew over to attack the heron. Man, did it sound awful. I was in my front yard talking with somebody about my fish ponds, and I headed toward the back just in time to see this attack. It was great, as I didn't want the heron to see or eat any of my koi or goldfish. I believe the Hawk was defending its territory and baby hawks.

    I had really never seen a Heron fly over my property, but a creek is just below us and I've seen them fishing there and then they fish in my subdivision's irrigation ditches as long as there aren't any dogs disturbing them. Now that my Sheltie is gone, I had to put him to sleep. The Mallard duck couple hang out in my irrigation pond all the time. Probably more peaceful than the creek below our property.
    I forgot to add that we also have the Rooster Pheasants that I will occasionally see fly over my rooftop or even land on it.

    You're right, I wouldn't want to move to a warmer climate that does have more dangerous creeping creatures hiding in the lush landscapes. Rattlesnakes I worry about, but not where I live, and I'll keep the garter snakes, even though once in awhile they will spook me. Usually those days are when I'm not thinking about them and they slither out of a spot that I uncovered.

    About The Secret, I do believe in those principles, as I already learned them by the power of thinking in my younger years, through prayer, making list of characteristics of a prospective husband, (which I might add...worked...as just now DH just delivered me a roasted chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy on a plate while I'm typing this). ;o) I'm not hungry as I just finished off a Reese's Peanut butter cup. :-D Anyway, I will still eat it, typing can burn a lot of calories! See positive thinking at work! LOL

    Okay, back to the Secret, I have the CD's, but also Marcia Weider's from years back as well. I think that one must weigh the pros and cons of what they are wishing for or desiring. Some of my goals were realistic and positive, no harm done to my family but can only add. While other wishes, just might be more selfish, and take away from what is really needed to make one happy. I can say, that I was purposely planning a scuba diving trip, had the photos, poster board, etc., but not having a good feeling about it. As long as I kept pushing this idea, I didn't feel at peace, I felt tension, and it wasn't until after more reasoning and information that I decided to stop focusing on this trip that I felt peace.

    Several reasons came about that make this not a good idea, civil unrest in the foreign country I was going to, DH wasn't going to go, some of our employees decided to take intellectual and physical property of our business and put us in a slump, more things involving the trip was going to cost more than anticipated, and some problems with family members showed up. As I let go of this trip, I was prepared for all of these reversals, or stumbling blocks, whatever you want to call it. Also, I was prepared and/or preparing for better things, events and/or relationships to come into my life, because I had freed up that time and brain energy to just let things be and relax.

    That doesn't mean I haven't been struggling, but I do know that I needed to let go of some activities to get the peace that I have been seeking through other means. And some of that was just doing too much gardening, and neglecting to do the harder stuff that was frustrating my family. I don't know if I have mentioned on here lately or even this thread, but I have lost a son to suicide. Sometimes when I think I am through the pain of it, it shows up, and I have more grief work to do. And as a Dr pointed out the other day, is that my gardening is easier to do, it makes me feel good physically, there is a different type of thinking when one is in the zone of gardening, and why would I want to go inside to a house full of papers to sort through, photos to look at, etc. It is too painful.

    But I don't realize that is my avoidance, I'm blaming why certain things aren't done because I have more important tasks to do. When probably in reality, as I focus attention to my grief, I don't need to be doing such busy activities and put added stress on finances or relationships. So I deleted emails from The Secret, Marcia Weider, and some other sites. I'm not saying they are bad, it is something that isn't for me. We have what we need and are able to help others and when the timing is right, I realize that deals for a scuba diving trip will show up and we will be ready for it. If I still want to take the trip, my interest might change by then. Maybe we will just take a trip to Vancouver and Victoria.

    But for now, I'm just trying to make it through the day, and forgive myself that I'm not outside working in the yard before the rains come, because that DR made me start to feel the pain again, and I spent yesterday driving all around the countryside, weeping, enjoying the fall colors, exploring mountain roads and then I just had to buy a Krispy Kreme Donut, which I hardly ever do and then come home and ignore my "to do" list.

    So here I am, spending hours on the computer, catching up on emails etc. connecting with friends...and now I have to reheat my chicken and potatoes and gravy, unfortunately, it isn't homemade, but Costco will do. ;-)
     

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